Got it eventually...
Still not totally satisfied with this version, but I'd already taken too much extra time and at least it's better than the first one.
@AdmiralBetas: He may not be the only cook in the whole world, but... They're already just fighting over stupid things like a married couple would.
That's enough for me to bless them in the holy bond of marriage :D
@Vilian: Hmm fair reasoning. But have you been ordained with the authority to commence the ceremony? :O
This is simultaneously adorable and snort-inducingly hilarious.